Forget The Flowers
by BringMeGiants
Summary: More musings from Grissom. And yes, the idiotic sounding summaries continue, so let's hope the story inside is slightly better...


**I've been struck with writers block all damn week, so a little bit of drabble, to hopefully get me out of it!**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed the other stories - much appreciated! Reviews for this one - ditto...**

**_Nope, still don't own anything or anybody_...**

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**Forget The Flowers**

_Flowers? _

_You're going to buy her flowers. Unbelievable._

What's wrong with flowers?

_Well, it's a little trite, don't you think? Everybody _always _gets the girl flowers. Hardly original…_

I distinctly remember a time, when somebody around here, couldn't _stop_ telling me how much girls like vegetation…

_Yeah, well, I was trying to be funny then. It simply never occurred to me that you might actually take me seriously. _

Huh. Just shows what you know. Besides, a plant did the business then, so there's no reason to believe that a plant won't be able to do the business now.

_Except, this time you don't just want her to stay. This time you want to get into her pan…_

No. No I don't. This is just a simple dinner, nothing more. There will not be any hanky panky of any description going on, just eating…and…and…

_Yeah, it's that "and" that has me a little worried…_

Nothing is going to happen…it's…way to early to start…thinking about…that…

_Ha! The gentleman doth protest too much me thinks. And I use the term "gentleman" advisedly…_

Oh, piss off.

Besides, flowers are the universally accepted gift from a man to a woman on a first date, so I don't see the problem.

_I do. _

_Exactly how sure _are _you that this is actually a bona fide date?_

Gee, let me think. I said: "Sara, would you like to go to dinner with me?" and she said "Yes."

Pretty cut and dried, I would say.

_Except that the words "Sara", "like", "dinner" and "me" never actually left your mouth. _

What the hell are you talking about? I distinctly remember saying…

_Noooooo. What distinctly ended up leaving your mouth, was more like: "Hey, wanna grab something to eat tonight?"_

Semantics.

Besides, I show up at her door with an armful of flowers and she'll catch the drift. She's a bright girl.

_Yeah, well, it's good to know that one of you in this - almost, maybe, kind of – relationship, has more than two brain cells to rub together._

Oh for crying in a bucket. Fine. No flowers then.

_Please, no flowers. Let's at least attempt to put some thought into this. _Pretend_ that we can come up with something a little more inventive._

Well, if the flower suggestion is a bust, then I'm officially out of ideas.

_What a surprise. _

_Look, when in doubt, apply reason, logic and common sense. So, the obvious question at this juncture would be: "What does she like?"_

Huh?

_Oh, for fuck's sakes. What does she like doing? _

How the hell should I know?

She likes - listening to her police scanner.

_You have got to be kidding me. If that is the best you can come up with, I would seriously suggest that we explore the wonderful world of shock therapy a little more closely._

_In fact, screw that. Just beat yourself over the head with a frying pan right now and put us all out of our misery._

You know if you spent a little more time concentrating on the problem at hand, and a little less time trying to be so damn snide…

You _are the problem at hand! You've know her for the better part of a decade and the freaking police scanner is the only thing you can come up with?_

What! She categorically told me once that she likes listening to the police…

_Yes, yes, yes, all right. _

_I'm starting to understand why you've never had anything resembling an actual girlfriend..._

Thanks for reminding me. As always you know just what to say.

_I try._

Let's just forget about this. No flowers, no gift. In fact - no date. I'll just call her and tell her something came up.

_Yes, something that looks more than just a little, like a huge enormous pile of bullshit. But tell her not to worry – at least now she gets to spend the evening listening to her beloved scanner…_

Kiss my ass.

_Look, you might be right about one thing. _

How refreshing.

_Maybe you shouldn't be buying her a gift._

Huh? So now I'm supposed to show up to my non-date…date…empty handed?

_I didn't say that. You should definitely give her a gift, but I'm just not so sure whether it should necessarily be something you can buy…_

Oh brother, here we go…

_No, hear me out. The whole purpose of a gift is to get the recipient something they really want, right?_

Right…

_So stop thinking about what you're going to _buy_ her, and start thinking about what you'd like to _give_ her._

What the hell are you talking about?

_Geez, you can be hard work sometimes. Pull your head out of your ass for just one damn second and think about it._

I _have_ thought about it. I couldn't come up with anything, remember? Apparently, that was the problem…

_Holy crap. You really are as thick as bricks sometimes. Plus, I no longer have the energy to play with you any more. So sit down, get a pen and a piece of paper and write this down…that will probably be the only way to get it into your fat head..._

Shoot.

_Give her the one thing she wants more than anything else. _

_Give her the one thing you want her to _have _more than anything else._

Which is?

_Your heart, you flaming idiot._

_Forget the damn flowers._

_Give her your heart._

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